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kidnapped, I was kidnapped

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Thursday, June 14th, 2007
8:47 pm - -
I was at my friend Jo's when I found out that Coach Mo Thigpen died.  I hadn't known.  "have you been on myspace at all today?" Jo asked me.  "it's all over myspace."  I hadn't been on myspace.  so I didn't know.
I remembered the time when Coach Mo brought my friends and me donuts in the morning before school just because he liked us.  I remembered the time when he busted Harrison for writing on the floor with permanent marker.  I remembered the time that he banned us from our spot the last month of freshman year, so we were forced to relocate directly downstairs and we played Gamecube that we had hooked up to a Coke machine.  I remembered how we all originally thought he was a jerk and how we called him "Tick Head" because of the black dot on the top of his bald head.  I remembered the times he'd made us laugh, the times he'd come by the window in the mornings before school just to talk to us.  I felt a deep pang of regret that that was as far as our relationship had gone.  and while he probably didn't remember my name, I certainly remembered his.
I suspected that Brandon would take it very hard.  Coach Mo was Brandon's favorite teacher, or so I think he was, and had been very involved in Brandon's personal and academic life.  Jo called Brandon, Brandon said he didn't want to talk.  I texted him.
"are you alright, man?"
"why wouldn't I be?"
"I know how much he meant to you.  if you need someone to talk to about it, you know I'm here for you."
silence.
Jo and I sat there on the porch of his apartment, smoking cigarettes and talking about Coach Mo.  a thick silence fell upon us as Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Freebird" came on Jo's stereo.  we sat there quietly, absorbed in our own thoughts for the duration of the song, the smoke from our cigarettes drifting upwards, resembling a piece of ribbon floating over the mouth of a terrible dragon.  I tore a piece of frayed denim from the leg of my jeans.  I ripped it right off.  I sat there, pulling at the threads until I had nothing left but a few stubborn strands that refused to sever their connection to one another.  then I went home and fell asleep and missed her calls.
2 (reply)
Monday, June 4th, 2007
2:54 am - I really love Colin Meloy
Bright Eyes: "Lua" (2005) from I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning (Saddle Creek)

Meloy: Who is this?

SW: Bright Eyes.

Meloy: I have one record by him that I would have traded in years ago, but I started a new thing before I bought it that I wouldn't sell any more records back. So, I bought one of his records, Fevers & Mirrors. I listened to half of two songs and put it away immediately and haven't listened to it since. His voice and his writing are just so irritating.

SW: Why do you think he's so popular?

Meloy: Because he's really hot. I mean, I think there's definitely something in this that you can relate to, but it is so easy to swallow it and imagine yourself in poor Conor Oberst's shoes. You know, everybody wants to be in that bedroom. But it does seem a little shallow and emotionally and creatively corrupt.

SW: When he played in Portland last month, he came out in a 10-year-old's raincoat, and when he got excited, he clapped like a hand puppet.

Meloy: They call it indie autism, and he's the poster child for it. Seriously, can we stop this?
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Sunday, June 3rd, 2007
2:44 am - God dammit
I'll let you in on what I've been wondering the past couple of weeks.  I've been wondering why I feel like I constantly have to be on the lookout for a girl.
what is it with me?  I wish I knew.  and it seems that as time goes on, the pickier I get.
"oh, she doesn't smoke or drink?  fuck that noise."
"she likes Bright Eyes?  bull-shit."
"she doesn't like watching movies?  ass."

I'd like to quote High Fidelity.  this won't be verbatim, so just work with me here.

"it's no use pretending a relationship can work if your record collections violently disagree with each other or if your favorite films wouldn't speak to each other if they met at a party".
Nick Hornby speaks words of wisdom.

but anyway.  I wonder why I can't be fine with being alone?  is it just me?  because I've noticed this behavior in my peers before.  I've never been a goofy, silly little "hehe I'm in love" kind of person, so I don't know why I want to be one so badly these days.  I never even really hang around in relationships for very long.  I always find something wrong with her and let it bug me so badly I break things off anywhere between two weeks to a month later.  super ghey.

I just don't know what's come over me.  I hear songs about girls these days, about love, and instead of going "oh yeah alright, bullfuckingshit" like I used to, I find myself listening and hearing the words and music and saying to myself "I want this".

it's fucking ridonkulous is what it is and I can't stand that I can't stand to be alone right now.
6 (reply)
Thursday, May 24th, 2007
10:25 pm - ghosts are annoying
I wrote a short film to tide me over until I'm ready to shoot Superconnected (which I really need to start casting or something).  it's called Ghosts Are Annoying.  it's really short, only about ten pages.
it's about a guy who's being haunted by a really obnoxious ghost who keeps playing pranks on him.  it's funny!
I'll probably shoot it within the next two weeks so keep an eye out.
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Sunday, May 20th, 2007
2:00 am - so
lawl there's a hotel hiring in Acworth.  it just so happens to be the scene of a murder.
a girl about my age (maybe older, maybe younger) was murdered there working the night shift a couple of years ago.
I would think that they've implemented some preventative measures since, either that or the whole ordeal was sort of a one-off thing.
in any case, I'm going for it.  no one's a bigger fan of danger than I.
2 (reply)
Thursday, May 17th, 2007
10:13 pm - NO JD, NOOOO
HOW COULD YOU
GOD DAMMIT
I AM SO PISSED
BUT MAN I CAN'T WAIT FOR NEXT SEASON
SCRUBS IS AWESOME

also, the Office was great, too.  this has been a really good year for season finales.  three of the four shows I watch are over and I have been so damn pleased with what I've seen.

Earl's in jail
Pam and Jim are going on a date
and JD is making probably the biggest mistake of his entire life

now all that's left is Heroes D:
4 (reply)
1:50 am - I don't fucking care that passed calculus.
"don't worry, this is the last time I'll ever say anything to you.  i just sincerely wanted to apologize for the way I ended things.  bye"

"I'm sure.  I honestly don't think you're sorry at all.  if you were, you would have shown a little more tact.  girls have done some lousy things to me before and I don't know why I thought you'd be any different"

if words could kill, I like to think I'd be a Desert Eagle.
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Tuesday, May 15th, 2007
11:50 pm - haha wow
I got dumped via text message.  this is so going in my script.

her: "I'm really sorry for what it's worth"
him: "it's not worth much"
4 (reply)
Friday, May 11th, 2007
1:07 am - damn my luck
I played the lottery for the first time ever the other day.
I totally didn't win.

:[
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Sunday, May 6th, 2007
11:55 pm - superconnected
I've been hanging out with a beautiful girl that I really like for the past couple of days and for some reason, she likes me back.
she looks like Hermione from the Harry Potter movies.
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